Cuckoo Kookoo

wren feeding cuckoo chickStephanie Young and I have been writing about Black Swan.  I sent her this photo of a wren feeding a cuckoo chick.

Sent with caption, “My sense of self lovingly nourishes its culturally imposed gender insecurities.”

The things I think of as parts of myself and what they might actually be.  When it helps me to feel like a “good person” if I have self-doubt and if I feed it.

The cuckoo chick looks so amazing with its big blank eye.  The wren’s eyebrow makes it look worried.  Going around the thinking about decoy space, gender, doubt.

Worrying as a strategy, or a psychic economy.  Reading about the impostor phenomenon where various accomplished women feel like frauds, no matter what they do.

This self-injury as a strategy – allowing the woman who feels like an impostor to keep advancing and accomplishing, without feeling too aggressive.

With aggression you’re unfeminine, denaturalized or received as such.  But the amazing thing about the cuckoo chick is how it lets you hide everything not just from them but from yourself, too.

And all by renting space to the cuckoo chick!  Well, giving, not renting.  The wren is nice.

The large body of the cuckoo chick gets fed, a contented blank off the wren’s work.  Much like the maestro in Black Swan.

Maybe the cuckoo chick is plotting its definitive re-interpretation of Swan Lake.  The wren has a lot of practicing to do.  But worrying will only get you technique.

And, this cuckoo chick is particularly good at making the wren feel like the impostor: Just by looking so bored!

If I sound sarcastic, it’s because I’ve been watching Black Swan, which is like the cuckoo of terrestrial cuckoos, with its canoe of war-surplus gondola parts.

O Oysters, come and walk with us!/The Walrus did beseech.

It would be simpler if there were a nest, with something in it, so I could say, “Get out of my head!”  Instead of a me, which is also a that.

Dan Thomas-Glass, back to the question of what runs inside or alongside ideologies?

Space and decoy space beside, alongside, inside, shot-through, honeycombed, particulate, between, next door.

cuckoo kookoo

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